-Okay, pay attention.
This is a spoiler. -Spoiler.
-Spoiler alert. -We are about to
tell you everything that has ever happened
in the universe. No, just on “The Good Place.” -Beginning of Season 1… -You, Eleanor Shellstrop,
are dead. -Cool. -…the Soul Squad,
the four humans, they meet Michael and Janet, and they are convinced
they are in the Good Place. -I’m not supposed to be here.
-Wait, what? -You could teach me
how to be good. -Until all hell breaks loose. -Mother-forking shirt balls. This is the Bad Place. -[ Laughs evilly ] -So, Michael
wipes everyone’s memory and restarts the neighborhood
hundreds of times, but our group
keeps figuring it out. -This is the Bad Place. This is the Bad Place. This is the Bad Place. -Bees. Bees. Bees. -So finally Michael decides
to join the humans. -I can get you
to the real Good Place. -The Bad Place
is about to be outsmarted by a cowardly traitor,
four dum-dums, and a robot. -Not a robot.
-Team Cockroach! -After that, we meet the judge
of the entire universe. -Where’s the judge? All I see is a burrito. -Unless the burrito
is the judge. -Hello, oh, great one. -What are you guys looking at?
[ All gasp ] -Hi. I’m the judge.
That’s a burrito. -She agrees to send us
back to Earth to try to earn the points
that we need to get into the real Good Place. -Here’s some money.
-Here you go. -One of the adventures we have,
we visit Doug Forcett. Here’s a man who’s living
the perfect life. -Two waters. -That has
an interesting aftertaste. -I have my composting toilet hooked up to
a water-filtration system. -And he probably won’t
get into the Good Place. So we realize there’s something
wrong with the point system. -Hey, guys, having fun?
Cool, cool, cool. So, we need to get out of here
immediately because this bar
is full of demons. -Janet and I come back, and we catch up with the four
humans who are in this bar. -Hello, idiots. -And then all of a sudden they get ambushed
by a bunch of demons. -♪ Rise up and face the demon ♪ -Janet kicks all their butts, sends them back
to the Bad Place. And then we go back
through Janet’s void. -All of you will definitely
die on Earth when I do this. -Wait, did you just say
we’re gonna d– -So then the judge decides
to allow Michael to rebuild the neighborhood
and start a new experiment to see if there’s a better way
to judge human beings. -So Michael brings in
four new test humans, but the Bad Place
gets to pick them. -Tahani Al-Jamil, I used to
write about you all the time on my blog, “The Gossip Toilet.” -The Bad Place didn’t pick
the worst people. They picked the people
who would be the worst for us. -Of course. They chose your
tormentors or archrivals. -Or exes. -One of those test humans is Chidi’s ex-girlfriend
from Earth. -Those mother-forkers. -If we don’t wipe my memory,
I will ruin the experiment. -That would be erasing —
-Us. -So Chidi’s memory, including
falling in love with Eleanor, is wiped. -In Season 3, Eleanor, who is now pretending
to be the architect, welcomes me into the Good Place. -Hi, Chidi. I’m Eleanor.
Come on in. -And I have no idea who she is. I know, right? -Season 4 will be the last —
sad but true. This is where the story ends. -Wait until you see
what happens. You are going to
lose your shirt. -Comedy starts here.