Doin’ It Donkey Style: Which Democrats Are Running?


WELCOME TO “THE LATE SHOW.” I’M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. AND IT IS–
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
YOU CAN JUST FEEL IT. YOU CAN FEEL THE VIBE IN THIS
ROOM. IT’S FRIDAY. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
IT’S ALSO DAY 28 OF THE GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN. IF THE NATION HAD STARTED A
CLEANSE, IT’D BE DONE NOW.( LAUGHTER )
WE HAD A BIG WEEK HERE ON “THE LATE SHOW.” ON TUESDAY? TUESDAY. NEW YORK SENATOR KIRSTEN
GILLIBRAND ANNOUNCED SHE’S RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT RIGHT OVER
THERE IN THAT CHAIR. BIG NIGHT, BIG NIGHT.( APPLAUSE )
IT’S THE MOST HISTORIC PRESIDENTIAL ANNOUNCEMENT SINCE
CHESTER A. ARTHUR DECLARED HIS CANDIDACY AT “THE BUFFALO BILL
WILD WEST SHOW.” THE ANNOUNCEMENT GOT A LOT OF
BUZZ FOR MY SHOW– UNFORTUNATELY, NOT THIS SHOW. JUST LISTEN TO HOW IT WAS
REPORTED ON “FOX & FRIENDS.”>>YEAH, I JUST CANNOT BELIEVE
HOW QUICK THEY’RE COMING OUT, HOW FAST THEY’RE COMING OUT, AND
THE VENUES THEY CHOOSE TO COME OUT ON WITH “THE COLBERT
REPORT.”( LAUGHTER )
( BOOING )>>Stephen: WHAT GIVES, BRIAN
KILMEADE? I THOUGHT WE WERE “& FRIENDS.”( LAUGHTER )
FIRST OF ALL, IT’S NOT THE COLBERT “REPORT.” IT’S THE COLBERT “REPOR.” OKAY? THE “T” IS SILENT– LIKE YOU
WERE DURING THE ROGER AILES SCANDAL.( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND– AND– AH, SHUCKEY DUCKEY. AND, SECOND, “THE COLBERT
REPORT” WENT OFF THE AIR OVER FOUR YEARS AGO. OR AS IT’S NOW KNOWN, “THE
BEFORE TIMES.”( LAUGHTER )
BUT I GET IT. I’M NOT THE MOST POPULAR GUY
OVER AT FOX NEWS. I’M A LITTLE MORE WELCOMED AT
MSNBC. RIGHT, RACHEL?>>THE VOTE WAS 57-42. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 58-42 HAD
SENATOR KIRSTEN GILLIBRAND NOT BEEN ON “THE COLBERT REPORT” AT
THE TIME DECLARING THAT SHE IS RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT.>>Stephen: RACHEL! RACHEL, HOW COULD YOU GET THAT
WRONG? YOU’VE BEEN ON THIS SHOW. WE WEAR THE SAME GLASSES. WE HAVE THE SAME HAIRCUT!( LAUGHTER )
I THINK THAT MEANS I COULD BE YOUR ORGAN DONOR.( LAUGHTER )
BUT THAT’S OKAY. LET IT GO. I’M NOT A VINDICTIVE MAN. I WILL STILL ENJOY WATCHING YOU
ON “THE RACHEL ROUNDUP.”( LAUGHTER )
OF COURSE, SENATOR GILLIBRAND ISN’T THE ONLY ONE OUT THERE. IT SEEMS LIKE EVERY MEMBER OF
THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY IS JUMPING INTO THE RACE, AND I’LL TELL YOU
ALL ABOUT IT IN MY NEW SEGMENT: “DOIN’ IT DONKEY STYLE.” FIRST UP ON “DONKEY STYLE,”
MASSACHUSETTS SENATOR AND RAVENOUS BABY CANNIBAL,
ELIZABETH WARREN. WARREN ANNOUNCED SHE WAS FORMING
AN EXPLORATORY COMMITTEE TWO WEEKS AGO AND THEN IMMEDIATELY
EMBARKED ON A FOUR-CITY TOUR OF IOWA. NOW, TECHNICALLY, THE HEADLINE
SHOULD HAVE BEEN: “THERE ARE FOUR CITIES IN IOWA.”( LAUGHTER )
THE NEXT DAY, THE NEXT DAY, WARREN LIVE-STREAMED FROM HER
KITCHEN, DRINKING A BEER, AND THINGS GOT
EVEN MORE #Relatable WHEN HER HUSBAND SHOWED UP.>>MY HUSBAND, BRUCE, IS NOW IN
HERE. UM… YOU WANT A BEER?>>NO, I’LL PASS ON THE BEER FOR
NOW. THANK YOU.>>YOU SURE? COME SAY HELLO WITH US. SO THIS IS MY SWEETIE.>>I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU, TOO. THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE. I’M GLAD YOU’RE HERE.>>ENJOY YOUR BEER.>>Stephen: THAT LED ONE
PARTICULARLY VICIOUS INTERNET TROLL TO TWEET, “BEST LINE IN
THE ELIZABETH WARREN BEER CATASTROPHE IS TO HER HUSBAND,
‘THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE. I’M GLAD YOU’RE HERE.’
IT’S THEIR HOUSE. HE’S SUPPOSED TO BE THERE!”
( LAUGHTER )
(AS TRUMP):LOOK, THE WHOLE
THING’S RIDICULOUS. CAN YOU IMAGINE A WIFE BEING
GLAD HER HUSBAND’S THERE? COME ON. IT DOESN’T PASS THE SMELL TEST. NO. HAS ANYONE SEEN MELANIA? MARCO?”
NEXT UP ON “DONKEY STYLE,” HAWAII REPRESENTATIVE AND ROGUE
LAUNCHING HER POST-“X-MEN” POLITICAL CAREER, TULSI GABBARD. GABBARD ANNOUNCED HER
PRESIDENTIAL RUN LAST FRIDAY, BUT HER CAMPAIGN IS OFF TO A
BIT OF A ROUGH START, BECAUSE RESEARCHERS FOUND MANY
ANTI-GAY-MARRIAGE STATEMENTS, LIKE THIS ONE:
>>TO TRY TO ACT AS IF THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CIVIL
UNIONS AND SAME-SEX MARRIAGE IS DISHONEST, COWARDLY, AND
EXTREMELY DISRESPECTFUL TO THE PEOPLE OF HAWAII. AS DEMOCRATS, WE SHOULD BE
REPRESENTING THE VIEWS OF THE PEOPLE, NOT A SMALL NUMBER OF
HOMOSEXUAL EXTREMISTS. WELL, WE’VE JUST SAID “ALOHA” TO
TULSI GABBARD, AND NOW IT’S TIME TO SAY “ALOHA” TO TULSI GABBARD.( LAUGHTER )
NEXT UP, FORMER HUD SECRETARY AND SEASON TWO “GILMORE GIRLS”
BOYFRIEND, JULIAN CASTRO. IN HIS ANNOUNCEMENT, CASTRO GAVE
A NOD TO HIS IMMIGRANT HERITAGE.>>WHEN MY GRANDMOTHER GOT HERE
ALMOST 100 YEARS AGO, I’M SURE SHE THAT NEVER COULD HAVE
IMAGINED THAT JUST TWO GENERATIONS LATER, ONE OF HER
GRANDSONS WOULD BE SERVING AS A MEMBER OF THE UNITED STATES
CONGRESS AND THE OTHER WOULD BE STANDING WITH YOU HERE TODAY TO
SAY THESE WORDS: “I AM A CANDIDATE FOR PRESIDENT OF THE
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.”( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>Stephen: YOU KNOW WHAT HIS GRANDMOTHER ALSO COULDN’T HAVE
IMAGINED? THAT OUR WATCHES TELL US TO
STAND NOW. I AM STANDING!

100 thoughts on “Doin’ It Donkey Style: Which Democrats Are Running?

  1. You know you have “made it” when you are featured on the “ Fox News “ (?)Show ,the one all the closed minds and demented ( Alzheimer’s) old folks watch ! So …..They don’t have to hobble down to the local store to buy a national inquiry for their fake news …………( I can say that because I am old too) 👵🏻👍🌊. 🦹‍♀️ < the real me

  2. That was a dishonest smear against Tulsi Gabbard. You look far back enough, most politicians were against gay marriage.

  3. That was said in 2004 I hope we can get her recent views on gay marriage….I think it’s sad that we use views from the past to attack people even tho it isn’t what Stephen did :. Those People need to take responsibility for their words tho..😑

  4. Hmm… the center-left smear campaign against one of the strongest progressive candidates begins…. Gabbard has long since forcefully disavowed those views, just as HRC and countless other Democratic darlings did. I expect better from you, Stephen.

  5. Progressive need to have a new symbol. We do not belong in the "party of the jackasses." Blue Dong Dems are NOT DEMS> They are Republican lite.

  6. Hahaa Tulsi fans… lol. She is a fan of Modi (look up Best Bakery Case in India) how on earth could you support someone so reprehensible.

  7. I'm wondering if she would call MLK and the civil rights movement a bunch of extremists if she was in politics back then…

  8. Stephen Colbert is still being the same corporate establishment tool, I see, with his smearing of Tulsi Gabbard. Imagine being a comedian, but instead of making fun of the status quo, making fun of the one candidate fighting the status quo. What a disappointment. I used to love him on the Colbert Report, before he sold out.

  9. The reason everyone confuses this show with The Colbert Report is because THAT show was unique, with a brilliant concept. Why Colbert decided to throw that away to host just another talk show is a mystery to me.

  10. why we know Tulsi's the Best? Everyone is trashin her!
    As Fan of Stephen, always sad when he exposes what a centrist-corporatist-clintonite rich-guy he really is…
    another "funny" Progressive sell-out… we see U stephen, not as good as Sam/Noah but we still watch, thanx.

  11. The information he gave about Tulsi Gabbard is outdated and incorrect. She has put out a public apology for her past views on the topic of homosexuality and expressed how her feelings have changed towards the topic which I think says a lot about a person in general let alone a politician. It's refreshing to know that someone in her position could see where she was at fault, feel a change of heart and publicly apologize for past statements and opinions. Also she has a 100% voting record in favor of LGBT rights. I've always really liked Colbert but I wish he would get all his facts straight before he puts out misinformation like this, I hope he will correct what he has said in the future. Check out this link for Tulsi's public apology:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLb3KVBErig

  12. Russia and North Korea along with the Chinese have finally pulled it off.

    They successfully managed to install a puppet president into the White House.

    The puppet is cooperating with all agents involved and the evidence is so obvious it's sickening.

    1. Upon taking office he proceeded to install the antithesis of all departments of the management of United States administration into "heads" of those departments.

    2. He's systematically fired any and all those who's position served to check and balance his office. He's done it in a very cunning way. Slowly, using our television and internet mediums to "soften" the blow.

    3. His administration is also very deliberately ignoring, denying and stalling all United Nations efforts to balance and resolve human rights violations across the globe.

    4. Through forceful and sustained media campaigns he's has successfully created the belief that the border between the USA and Mexico has some sort of "crisis" and while US citizens look "that way" he is negotiating with Russia, North Korea and China the best route to hand this country over to them with the least amount of bloodshed possible.

    5. American 'faith" in the democratic process was used against us and I regret to inform you that the aforementioned has already won.

    Now here's the tough news.

    AMERICA IS ALREADY DEFEATED.

    I urge all those that can covertly take control of any type of mass media source (radio, internet, television) to infiltrate, gather resources and embed yourself into positions that can provide resistance.

    I urge anyone within eye-shot of this post to steel yourselves to resist in any way possible as well.

    I urge anyone in the US Military to do all that is possible covertly to infiltrate, disrupt and resist as long as possible

    Finally, I say to you all. These will be the toughest of times.

    Remember WE are Americans. We are fighters, we are winners.

    Dark hours have come before and thus approaches our darkest hour yet. So be it. It has been before.

    WE WILL FIGHT!

    We will fight on the shores of the Atlantic and the streets of New York City.

    We will fight in the hills of the Adirondacks and the Green Mountains of Vermont.

    We will fight on Lake Champlain and in New Hampshire.

    We will defend our country.

    We will fight on the highways and on the back roads.

    We will fight in Pennsylvania, Virginia and North and South Carolina.

    We will fight on the the rooftops and in alleyways and basements.

    We will fight in Louisiana and on the Gulf Coast and the oil fields of Texas.

    We will fight in Tennessee, Mississippi and Alabama.

    We will fight in Illinois and Montana and Utah.

    We will fight in Arizona, Nevada and California.

    We will fight in Puerto Rico and Hawaii!

    WE WILL DEFEND OUR NATION FROM WITHIN WHATEVER THE COST MAY BE.

    We will not back down.

    We will not retreat.

    The hour is very, very dark my American family.

    It has been dark before.

    So we shall bring the light.

    RESIST-SUBVERT-INFILTRATE-REVOLT!

  13. Tulsi Gabbard has issued apology and said that her views changed as she grew up in conservative family. I think that gay-right activists should give her a chance as this is exactly what they need, someone who knows how it is to hold conservative view but has changed their view on it using common sense. She is great, intelligent and has extremely smart foreign policy approach.

  14. People in the comments I think give Colbert a tad too much credit for the Tulsi thing, the dude's just reciting what a team of writers put up on a teleprompter and he can put his own personality on it

  15. SMEARING TULSI?? BOOOOOOOO! She has since apologized for that yr old statement. Hillary's were much more recentr! He smeared Bernie too! BOOOOOOOO!

  16. Frankly I think if he wanted to, Bernie could walk into the room, look at the camera Larry David style, ask "What is this shit show?" and he'd instantly win.

  17. Corrupt MSM doing thier best to sabotage the politicians not controlled by the oligarchs already.

    Funny how colbert never talks about the entire democratic primary in 2016 being rigged against bernie. Tulsi Gabbard was the only DNC official to stand against that, hence she needs to be destroyed too

  18. It was in 2004, people change, opinions change. Discrimination sucks but if a person changes their positions wouldn't it be ok to let bygones be bygones. JMHO. Maybe I'm wrong, who knows.

  19. Real talk? Don't want Gillibrand to win. She is clearly a corporate democrate and flips her position based on the political winds. Look at all the horrible things she used to support! Elizabeth Warren 2020 man! Thats what we need .

  20. Dismisses candidate based of a debunked and disingenuous smear. Literally a statement she made years ago and he doesn’t even mention record or policy. Absolutely trash segment. Whatever 20yrold clickbaiter you have as a writer should be fired. .

  21. Why didn't Elizabeth Warren shout out "I like beer"? That seems get people to side with you no matter what…Come on, Lizzie!

  22. This video is a reminder not to blindly believe whatever this show says. The part about Tulsi was really cherry picked info. I wonder if this is how a lot of the Republicans we joke about feel like that. Misrepresented and mocked.

  23. Please don't do what the Republicans did last time and bring a couple dozen lackluster candidates. That's what got us into this mess.

  24. nahh… we need another 4 years of an entitled, semi-literate, misogynist, a-hole, hypocrite to finish ruining this formerly great nation

  25. The only way I would ever watch Colbert again is if he comes out and APOLOGIZES to Tulsi Gabbard for his disingenuous bit against her.

    What these failed establishment shills don't realize is that their attacks on Tulsi Gabbard (eerily similar to the attacks on the candidate Bernie Sanders) will only strengthen her run as people will see the obvious collusion by the mainstream media against her.

    We shall and will always sympathize with those who can evolve as a person to be better, then use the power of action to prove they are indeed worthy of forgiveness.

    Unlike your losing horse Hillary who is nothing more than a corporate pawn. I think you have now fallen in that same category.

    We are no Trumpsters.

    WE DO OUR DUE DILIGENCE!

  26. Tulsi Gabbard was raised in a very conservative home. She said that in 2004 but that does not express her views today which are Progressive views. Happily, she does not have the regressive views of the corporate democrat which this show promotes!

  27. Please help! I made a video detailing a legal argument that one could use to potentially overturn Roe v. Wade. I've researched it for a couple years, and it covers the idea of the Unborn Victims of Violence Act of 2004 retroactively triggering Roe's "Collapse Clause". I've tried really hard to send it to conservative media outlets, government officials and and personalitie, but I haven't had much luck with it. If you care about abortion, I sincerely urge you to check out this video I made on it. The film quality is really bad and some of it is outdated–my apologies for that aspect–but I think it's incredibly important because I've never seen others address this argument in detail (some articles and law reviews addressed it the early 2000s). Please check it out, and if you think it's important, as I do, it would be so awesome if you could share it (the video or the argument itself) with anyone you can. God Bless and have a great day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSD_aP_2Ies&t=84s

  28. Colbert, if you actually thought that what trump and the corporate Dems did was wrong, you’d be a little nicer to someone like Tulsi who would go against these atrocities

  29. Politically speaking, Tulsi's statement was 15 years ago, so she could've "evolved" her thinking since then
    It doesn't mean she's actually gonna do a 180 in her head/heart though

  30. Oh the Tulsiflakes make me cringe. So, being against her, you're part of the establishment? Give me a break. Stephen Colbert is a liberal. Same with Trevor Noah, who also joked and criticized about Tulsi's anti-LGBT past. What if the day South Park makes fun of them? Who next? John Oliver? Sam Bee? Seth Meyers? Seth MacFarlane? Are we going to call Matt and Trey, two centrist libertarians who hate BOTH parties, part of the establishment?

    Me? I am a liberal, and Tulsi Gabbard to me is a DINO through and through. She has way more in common with Donald Trump than Bernie Sanders.

  31. Stephen's just pointing out how Gabbard's past comments will hurt her, whether or not she's changed her mind. Some will still take those comments to heart today.

  32. Colbert, you have lost me. Your divisive attack on Tulsi Gabbards past is proof that you are a stooge for the neoliberal establishment. Set the record straight or continue spreading hate.

  33. Bernie-Tulsi 2020!!! The smear machine is in full effect. People.. tulsi is the MOST ANTI WAR CANDIDATE we’ve had since Carter. Her economic policy is In line with BERNIE. bernie needs her if He’s going to be able to get on the ballot!!

  34. colbert an his likes believe in manufacturing consent. all part of the status quo and establishment. Tulsi challenges all this, they don't like it

  35. They are already starting to smear Tulsi Gabbard. Everything they have said thus far have proven to be smears. Look at her actually positive record on LGBTQ issues. That quote was from 19 years ago when she was 22 and just started to be a young state representative, I think she has shown she has changed, she has literally continuously apologized for years. But …

    She called out the DNC for "rigging" the election and the Mainstream media for assisting.

    She is calling out big Pharma.

    And she is calling out these endless BS wars. (And she is still serving in the Army National Guard)

    Thats why they are smearing her out of context and making you assume "Rep" means her current position.

    Gabbard seems like the only one who isnt posing.

  36. Wow Stephen Colbert, once you were the bravest journalist/comedian on TV… It is sad to see what you have become… hope they are paying you a bucket-load of money to do the work of the establishment…

  37. TULSI GABBARD SAID THAT WHEN SHE WAS 20 AND WORKING ALONG WITH HER DAD WHO IS/WAS SUPPPPER CONSERVATIVE AND HAD A CONSERVATIVE ANTI GAY RADIO SHOW…..SO IM SURE SHE HAS SAID A LOT OF THINGS. BUTTTT SHE ALSO HAS TOLD THE TRUTH WHICH IS MORE THAN YOU CAN SAY FOR 80% OF THE CANDIDATES THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA ARE ENDORSING. TULSI HAS APOLOGIZED AND SAID SHE HAS CHANGED HER VIEWS ON LGBT RIGHT DRASTICALLY AS DID 99% OF POLITICIANS FROM THE YEAR 2006 WHICH THIS STATEMENT IS FROM!!! THE REASON THEY ARE SET OUT ON SMEARING HER IS BECAUSE THE ELITE ARE WORRIED SHE WILL EXPOSE THE TRUTHS BEHIND OUR WARS AND OUR TRUE DISGUSTING REASONS WHY THEY ALL SECRETLY WANT MORE WAR…..MONEYYYYY. AND BY EXPOSING AND PUTTING A STOP TO ALL OF THE OIL AND GREED DRIVEN WARS IS NOT IN THEIR INVESTORS BEST INTERESTS THEREFORE THEY DIG UP SOME IRRELEVANT QUOTE AND TRY TO MAKE HER OUT TO BE MIKE FUCKING PEENCE WHEN IN REALITY SHE WAS 20 I THINK DURING A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT TIME POLITICALLY FOR LGBT RIGHTS ANNND NOT TO MENTION SHE WAS JUST BARELY STARTING HER LIFE AWAY FROM HER PARENTS WHO HAVE INDOCTRINATED HER WITH THEIR EXTREMELY CONSERVATIVE VIEWS CONSIDERING HER FATHER RAN AN ANTI-GAY RADIO SHOW AND WAS VERRRRRY VOCAL WHEN IT CAME TO PEOPLE WANTING EQUALS. I UNDERSTAND NOT FULLY JUMPING IN AND SUPPORTING HER BUT WE MUST BE SMARTER THIS COMING ELECTION AND NOT JUST VOTE FIR WHO THEYYYY TELL US TO!!!!! WE ALLL SEEN HOW THAT WORKED OUT! JUST BECAUSE IT IS THE DNC DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE ANY LESS MANIPULATIVE AND SHADY AS THE RNC….POLITICIANS ARE POLITICIANS

  38. Do your homework, Stephen. She was in her late teens/early 20s at the time, heavily influenced by her vehemently anti-gay activist father. For her to evolve as she has, into the champion for equal rights she's since become (100% pro-LGBT voting record, recently endorsed for Prez by the Human Rights Campaign, etc.) should be commended. Instead, she's bashed by both left and right. I've done a similar 180 since I was a kid, and I'm DAMN proud of it.

  39. This is why I don't like Colbert. He's a huge fraud who is really dishonest in his smears against progressive candidates. A sellout in the most ugly sense of the word, like every television talk show host. Can't wait to see him kiss Biden or Kamala's ass whenever he has them on (whichever one of these corporate tools the Democrats decide they're going to rig the primaries for). 🙄

  40. Yep. Now Colbert is associated with Fox News. Makes perfect sense. Right-wing neolib jerk! Gillibrand? cut me a break!

  41. Colbert has proven to be a total NeoLiberal POS!!! Tulsi deserves more respect, if anything else just for being an honorable veteran!

  42. Nice smear piece on Tulsi. Can you keep the propaganda a little more subtle Stephen? I'd like to keep my lunch.

  43. Colbert you should apologize to Tulsi for that disgusting smear. Your only excuse might be if your network sponsors wanted you to do it. Even still you should have refused.

  44. Ha I came on here to lambast Colbert a bit, couldn't seem to find the actual Gabbard interview mysteriously, but I now see that I am late. Good on you all. As for the man, let's just say he stands revealed. Shame on you Stephen, shame.

  45. WHY IS THIS VIDEO ROCKETING UP IN VIEWS? – People are looking up Tulsi Gabbard and realizing what a corporate tool Colbert has become.

  46. I hope your dismissal of Tulsi Gabbard turns out for her like your dismissal of Donald Trump turned out for him.

  47. its interesting how they manipulate the likes to dislikes ratio. the comments are over %75 critical of stephen for smearing tulsi, yet the like-dislike ratio has less than %5 dislikes. clear shenanigans goin on

  48. Lesbian here, weighing in. Let’s just ignore the fact that Gabbard not only has issued a heartfelt apology, but she also has a 100% voting approval rating from the largest LGBTQ organization in the world, HRC. Hey, Colbert…you’re pocket book’s bias is showing.

  49. So disappointed in Colbert. Tulsi Gabbard was raised conservatively and when she changed her views she's worked hard for equality every since.

  50. Tulsi is become a filter to clear out all the bought out fake media , welcome to garbage can ! >Colbert< u are a lie too

  51. Mr. Colbert …..not like Jon Stewart old days whom often stand up for good cause,
    You are just corporate & establishment prostitute ….
    ….. and now excuse me ☝️ cause I have to 🤮

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